I feel like Princess Leia.
"Help us, Mitt Romney! You are our only hope."
The evil Chancellor McCain is somehow being considered as a candidate for Emperor. Even now his evil henchman are attempting to take over the world. Known as Hillary, Obama, and Shmuckabee, they ravage the land, in search of anyone whom they can convince to join the dark side of the force. McCain has turned against us, plotting in secret all the while, his devious trickery and flattering words deceiving thousands. . . .
Is there no one who can yet save the Empire? I mean, the Republic?
Mitt Romney, may the force be with you. . . .
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